Is a wave not part of the Ocean?

The following is written by Eva Capozzola, Forget Me Not Country Director, Nepal. Eva is currently in Uganda visiting the Forget Me Not projects.

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"I'm prepared to grovel. To humiliate myself abjectly, because, in the circumstances, silence would be indefensible. So those of you who are willing: let's pick our parts, put on these discarded costumes and speak our second-hand lines in this second-hand play. But let's not forget that the stakes we're playing for are huge. Our fatigue and our shame could mean the end of us. The end of our children and our children's children. Of everything we love. We have to reach within ourselves and find the strength to think, to fight."

- Arundhati Roy
[The Algebra of Infinite Justice]

...

Before I go to sleep, the water runs Ugandan red from the dust coating my skin, just as it runs brown after long days in Nepal. 

As I lay down to sleep, images move through my mind. Near Kampala, Rabina's sister's tears of joy because her sister is now going to school, are composed of the same salt water as Alisha's sister in Rasua, Nepal who cried with the same happiness.

Ronald and Dinah brought us to their home in a nearby slum, it could have been Junu taking us to see her mother.

Mama Miriam's joy and gratitude for her home that is now complete, that is now a safe place for her children to sleep at night, away from predators, dry from the rain and protected from Mosquitos, reminds me of the pride Rabina's mother in Nepalgunj feels about the work they are doing on their own home so that Rabina can return to her village and family. 

Driving hundreds of kilometers to Torrorro in Uganda makes me think of night busses and the 20 hours it takes to reach Devaki's village in Mahindranagar in Nepal. 

The children whose lives have become intertwined with our own are far reaching. From Kampala to Kathmandu, Nakasungola to Nuwakot we are engaged with children from urban slums to remote mountain villages.

As we cross political borders and geographical boundaries, as the skin tones and languages, belief systems and cultures that surround us morph and change, there are some things that don't change at all. 

Children deserve respect and dignity. They deserve educstion and love. They deserve to be able to have a say in the direction of their own lives.

The challenges facing many families are great; economic strain, cultural pressure, geographic isolation, lack of educational opportunities, insufficient health care, food insecurity, resulting in the displacement of children in the hope that they will find the care they need elsewhere. For many children, they are at risk if they stay with their families, but they still deserve the right to be connected to them, to know them. 

If we look at each child as our own, we can be sensitive and receptive to these challenges and realities and work alongside our brothers and sisters, sons and daughters so they may realize change in their own lives. 

Sarah and Olivia in Uganda, DB, Jampa, Jenny and the entire THIS team in Nepal are the true agents of this change within their communities. We are in their corner. We are behind them, beside them and will continue to be. 

As one family we can contribute to growing children who have a sense of justice, dignity, humility, respect and love. 

While at New Beginnings, Andrea responded to Rogers gratitude for FMN's support as "drops in the ocean." 

"But we are all water," Roger replied. 

We are droplets, we are waves, all of the ocean. And water knows no bounds. 

News from Uganda//December 2012//Ugandan Children Reunite!

Forget Me Not Families Ugandan kids reunite!

 

Mel Faulkner, Nanna Project Coordinator, attended the Christmas Reunion arranged for our Ugandan children. These children were rescued last year and returned to their families. This was the first time since the rescue that the children have seen each other again.

We had a bit of a rocky start, as much of the transport bringing the children was late.  As each new child joined the other children on the bus there were cheers and looks of great happiness on all the faces on board.  Many of the children where then shy and quite reserved but you could sense that they were happy to see their old friends. 

Once we reached the location of the reunion and everyone was showed to their rooms etc you could sense the nervous excitement of the children.  It was great to see the older children taking care of the little ones and even the older boys getting in for cuddles with Abu the youngest.  It was clear they were very happy to see each other.  The counsellor Oliva looked relieved and happy to see the children.  I could tell that this was going to be a very special few days. 

Once everyone was settled we met in the dinning hall for dinner.  I got the chance to introduce myself to a few of the children who were very curious about me as was I about them.  In some of their faces you could see they have been through a lot.  Lydia volunteered to say grace which she did very nicely.  We ate a delicious meal, the children especially enjoyed the chicken and sodas.  During dinner there was lots of chatter and I knew that tomorrow the children would be much more lively and comfortable in their surrounds.

Hannah practiced her speech in front of Sarah and I.  It was great to see how good she was with words and it was obvious that she is receiving a good education.  The kids retired to their rooms with paper and pens to write letters to their sponsors and prepare for a big day tomorrow. 

Friday was our big day we woke early in the morning and had breakfast.  The children where much more chattery and noisy.  Sitting at one table we heard one of the boys, Ronald who had been forced to take on the name Opio at the home to fill a lost boys place correcting the children who did not know him and his sister by their new (true) names.  I listened to Sarah tell stories of what happened to the kids in the home, afterwards and also threats made to her and her family.. I fought back the tears, this would be a happy time for everyone. 

After breakfast Hannah chaired a devotion.  Singing songs of praise in both English and Luganda.  The children come from many different religious backgrounds but you could sense that they all enjoyed these beautiful songs.  Hannah is a great young lady, she has a strong sense of herself and demonstrates great leadership skills.  You can also see her love and protection for all of the children.  She is like a mother watching out for them all and chastising them when they misbehave.   She was very interested in me and I feel like she would love to have an older sister to share her stories and support her. 

The entertainers arrived and the children's excitement escalated.  There were dj's playing popular tunes in both Luganda and english, a bouncing castle, a clown, a group of children acrobats - it really was a grande show.  The children danced and sang, jumped and laughed it was really great.  Gloria sang a song and although she was nervous she did a great job.   Some of the other girls performed a dance to a well known song.  The clown made the children hats, flowers and swords out of balloons and managed games.  The younger children were fixated with jumping in the castle.  The older children joined in the games, dancing and showed off their skills with the football.   The rain disrupted the outdoor activities but we were able to move the music inside and the fun continued.  Lunch was enjoyed by everyone, especially the soda.  Soda is an extremely important part of any party in Uganda. 

After lunch we had speeches and the giving of gifts.  Hannah had prepared a beautiful thank you speech.  Each child said their name, where they now lived, the name of the schools they now attended and offered something they liked and something they disliked.  Wasswa Esa told us proudly for the millionth time that he was positioned 7th out of 151 students in his class, the other kids gasped and we all cheered in congratulations.  We then gave out gifts from the sponsors and Forget Me Not.  Nobody missed out as there were party bags with sweets, biscuits and small toys.  Any child who would fit a pair of donated high top shoes was given a pair and all of the sponsor children received clothes as their christmas party.  The hall was full of children playing, trying on new clothes and shoes and really enjoying themselves. 

The dancing continued. I got up for a few rounds which the children loved and laughed hysterically.  Joseph had control of the microphone and was narrating over the music.  Encouraging participation and judging the dancing at one point stating  "we all agree Aunty Mel was the best".  I could not believe this but appreciated the small lie.  These kids can dance!

We had dinner and more soda and then small groups where joined for discussions.  Even though everyone was exhausted from a big day we all stayed up till late chatting.  This really was a big family and I was thrilled to be a part of it.  Little Abu came up for a cuddle and fell asleep in my lap.  The children especially from homes need so much love and attention.  I said to one of the visitors that if I lived in Uganda I would need to have a huge house so I could provide a home for all the children. 

The last day of the reunion had come around.  It had rained all all night and the morning.  The children where excited about the zoo and we were hoping the rain would stop so that we could go.  We had breakfast of milk-tea, boiled eggs, bread and banana and organised ourself for the trip to the zoo and the journey back to Kampala where we would all split up and return to our homes. 

Luckily the rain did stop and we all enjoyed a great trip to the zoo.  Most of the children would have never been to the zoo before or seen most of the animals that were found here.  There are national parks in Uganda that host these animals in their natural environments but as travel and admission is costly, most Ugandan's will never get to enjoy that experience.  The zoo guides gave the kids great explanations and insight into all the animals.  Both the kids and the adult visitors asked lots of questions.  The chimpanzees where are definite favorite, we were lucky enough to be there while they where thrown bananas for breakfast.  We all laughed to see them hold our the and clap and beg for the food.  The playground at the zoo was a hit especially amongst the younger kids. 

While we were walking along I got to chat to some of the older girls.  Asha was very interested in Australia and what it is like there, and told me how she wanted to be a singer and a dancer.  Victoria wanted to know if I knew of  Bunderberg where her sponsor was from.  I enjoyed answering their questions and encouraging them in their studies.  Abu counted to 29 and said the alphabet and we all giggled.  The older children have taught him well in preparation for nursery school next year.  

After the zoo we boarded the bus for a traveling lunch of chips and chicken and the return trip to Kampala.   Hannah sat next to me and handed out the food and drinks to the kids, making sure no-one missed out.  She showed me a certificate she had received for being part of a speech group at school and told me how she wanted to be a lawyer while she fussed over the small children around us.  I told her I felt like she was the mum to all of the kids and she said that they were all very special to her.  That she had really enjoyed the few days getting to see everyone again.  I felt sad to be seeing the kids leave us in small groups.  I had really enjoyed getting to know these kids even over such a short time.  I felt lucky to have been about to be involved with the reunion and felt like I was there to experience it with the kids on behalf of everyone at Forget Me Not and their sponsors.  Sarah had tracked down Stevens father so we were handing Steven over to his care for the first time which was also a great occasion to be involved in.  Steven's father had also agreed to look after Mary during the holidays.  We made sure they had everything and said goodbye.  It's so amazing to witness these kids being reunited with their families and the families taking responsibility for their children. 

When it was my turn to get off the bus I wished everyone a safe journey.  I know this will not be the last time I see these kids.  I headed back to Jinja exhausted.

News from Nepal//December 2012//New Partners-New Beginnings

Breaking news!

After seven months of painstaking legal work, Forget Me Not secured the release of 20 children from the custody of our former local partner. This action was taken after evidence of financial mismanagement and denial of the children’s rights was revealed. The children were immediately brought to the safety of a transit home operated by Next Generation Nepal (NGN) – an American charity which works to reunify trafficked children with their families – and are now settled in their new home operated by Forget Me Not’s new partner, The Himalayan Innovative Society (THIS). In the words of one of the children, “I’m so happy to be in a new place, starting a new life with new dreams. This is the first day of the rest of our lives.”

The past year has been huge for Forget Me Not.

When we opened Forget Me Not, we began with 6 children who were documented as orphans. However as time passed and we got to know the children, piece by piece some of their stories began to emerge. With the puzzle for each child in such disarray we knew that we must continue to collect their true information and histories. As we have discovered this information, we have shared it with you. Walking this journey with the children has been emotionally delicate work.

The situation was highlighted when we employed our first Country Director, Eva Capozzola, in January 2012. Immediately, the children confided in Eva that they remembered their relatives and some of them had actually tried to contact and visit the children but had been turned away by the partnering organisation who had been operating the children’s home since its conception. While the children had their material needs met through child sponsorship, there remained a pain beneath the surface that came from being denied the right to know their families.

When we discussed  the prospect of finding the children’s families with the partnering organisation, we were met with resistance. The partnering organisation feared that if the children were to be reconnected, they would lose their funding and so had been coercing the children to remain silent about their pasts. They were opposed to conducting any program to retrace and hopefully reconnect the children with their families, thus denying both the children and their relatives their right to have a relationship. We knew we had to take action.

On Eva’s advice, we decided to dissociate from the partnering organisation. This would not be an easy journey. We spent time building our case with several visits from Forget Me Not Australia to Nepal to facilitate the process and check on the children’s welfare. The children wrote statements describing their fears and their desire to be free from the partnering organisation. After discovering such statements were made, the committee of the partnering organisation became hostile and threatened the children with expulsion and violence. Eva was denied access to the children but smuggled a mobile phone to the girls in order to maintain communication and monitor their safety. Escape plans were established in the event that threats became too severe.

After 7 months of painstaking legal work, we were successful in releasing the legal custody of the children to Forget Me Not’s new local partner, The Himalayan Innovative Society (THIS). The children were immediately taken to a transit home operated by Next Generation Nepal where they were welcomed into the warm arms of Forget Me Not, THIS and NGN staff.

As part of the new partnership, Eva gathered the girls to discuss what they would like to do – Move house? Move school? The children unanimously decided that they would like to move to a new house in a new area but remain at the same school. A house was located, painted, and furniture ordered. The girls are now safely ensconced in their new home.We are incredibly proud of these young women, who together with your support, have formed a strong sisterhood within the Forget Me Not family.

Forget Me Not selected The Himalayan Innovative Society (THIS) to be our new implementing partner. THIS comes highly recommended by several reputable international organisations. They are very experienced and skilled in the reunification and reintegration arena of child welfare. NGN will be acting as a technical advisor and partner for Forget Me Not as we move forward with our work of reconnection and reintegration. Forget Me Not is grateful for the opportunity to collaborate with both of these excellent organisations and is looking forward to the work we will do together in the future.

The work will now begin to find the families of the children.

Our Projects in Nepal will continue to be based around the best interests of the children in our care.

Our proposed Projects currently centre on three main activities:

1. Forget Me Not Children’s Home – Current project. Children are cared for in a family style environment and provided with food, shelter and education.

2. Forget Me Not Families – Reunification and Reintegration Project. As in Uganda, where children are reconnected with their families, they will be able to either remain in Forget Me Not Children’s Home, or transition back to familial care and continue to be in the family environment. These options will be carefully monitored with the best interests of the children at the heart of this activity.

3. Forget Me Not Futures – Providing educational and living expense support to young adults who are pursuing higher education after leaving Forget Me Not Children’s Home or the Forget Me Not Families Project.

With your commitment and unwavering support, we continue to work with passion and determination in securing brighter futures for the children of our world.